Well, yet it again it's been far too long since I have written in this blog. I like talking about myself and have strong desire for eveybody to know about me, thats how selfish I am, get in. Anyway, I went to Bournemouth last week to visit dearest Kelly, to do some writing on our sit-com, and we naturally went to Bingo. I say that sounding as if I go every week, trust me, I don't. Those that do go every week don't like ANYTHING like those happy-go-lucky kids on the adverts...far from it.
Anyway, as well as Kelly's beloved not only doing a scandalous 'false call' (what an idiot, I didn't want to look at him for the rest of the night), but I only went and won £100!!! Back of the net! So i've spent it on a Satellite Navigation system, as I'm getting bored of concentrating whilst driving. Having the lure of a touch screen increases the chance of crashing by 50%, much more exciting I reckon!.
Anyway, I will get Kelly to do some writing on here, she can do some funny stuff. By the way, our sit-com is going to be friggin' marvellous, you just wait.
Also, one last thing, take a look at my artwork from my old 'See A Song' website. People would send in their lyrics and 'Dr Lyrics Artist' would draw them. Here's one of my favourites... "Twinkle, twinkle little star
My apologies, it's almost been two weeks since we graced Winchester streets with our faces, but we have not updated the world with our antics in that time... so I'm sorry!
Anyway, our Saturday afternoon in Winchester was spent fundamentally in pubs, one to another, sitting around chatting, eating delightful plates of mixed grills and chips, basically exactly what we used to do when we were students...oh how I miss those days... when your main worry was either "shall I go to the garage to pick up a bottle of Frijj milkshake?" or "I can't believe I had 3 Damien Duff stickers in my football sticker pack this week, what a rip off".
Now I sit and write out job application answers... grrr... I'll get a radio job soon don't worry, then Kelly and I can take on the broadcasting world with a show that will make Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant and Karl Pilkington seem like boring old farts... But they're not though, they are amazing (love you Karl!)
Right, so Winchester was great, I'm heading to Bournemouth this Saturday for Kelly and I to gel our two comedy minds to make a piece of sit-com art! So look forward to that! I'll get the Scottish one to add some photos from Winchester, I've got one of me from the morning, my delightful girlfriend decided to capture some of the grease from my hair....mmmmm...
Hot news: this weekend sees the return to Winchester for Kelly and Benji. That's right, the annual gathering of the 'has been' students who still wish they were living the uni lifestyle is upon us once more. Known as 'Winton', they come from far and wide, giving Kelly and Benji to meet with all the other 'kool kidz' fromm university and fun 'n' frolics.
What is sure to be a carnage filled time, Kelly will only be there during the day, but I'm sure fun will be had at both day and night, sleeping and awake. Oh yes. Further news to follow I'm sure...
Also, thought I'd add a picture of the 'Bearded Lady of Guildford'... Yes she's real... and yes she is a 'she'... love it.
P.S Happy Valentines day everybody, and much love to sent out to all on this special day :)
So, let me give you some background to my work situation... I have worked in an administration role for a travel company for about a year and a bit, earning some millionnaire a load more money, as I scrape together enough for a extortionate copy of NME each week (£2.10, too dear for me!). Alas, the cost of rock 'n' roll these days eh!
Anyway - so now I've quit this admin role, but am working there almost part-time to train up my replacement, a 45 year old 'drink-gin-in-my-lunch-break' kinda guy. I'll be honest, the ladies find him creepy, I just think he smells a bit. So there's the pointless yet slightly entertaining background.
On Wednesday, I decided to go to work, and throughout the day, my replacement guy (lets call him Gerald) asks for my help and advice for various things. Also, our manager is away this week, so basically I'm his boss for the week, remember this! Usually, he would call for help, or stroll round to my desk to ask questions. This one time however, he decides to look at me as I walk past, say my name and use his finger as -what I can only call- a fishing hook to beckon me...
I couldn't believe it! How angered I was at this rude behaviour. Luckily I was able to curb my frustration and just have a mild 'go' at him, saying how I would not respond to that and couldn't believe he did it.... I think with him he thinks that because I am in the prime time of my life, half his age, have about 10 times more hair that him, then it is acceptable to treat me less than a human. I think not Mr Gerald! Well, I'm just glad I'm over that now and have forgiven him... I'm going to head and throw some darts at his face now :o) bye for now!
Ooo...Also, I thought I would add a little video of me filming a crowd bottle fight at Reading Festival last year before getting smacked myself, damn those kids!
Alas! I was ill today... But hooray! That means no work for me, and another chance to not only add a new post to the blog, but discuss an observation I have made today.
Due to my illness (no, it's not AIDs, just a headache)-(no, I haven't been sticking my head up any one's bum)-(no, nobody has stuck their head up MY bum either)-(no bums and no heads are involved!).
Anyway, due to being a bit ill, I went to the doctor, as any upstanding citizen would do. However, little did I realise that even those who are not such an upstanding citizens still go to the doctors! Whilst I was sitting waiting for my name to flash up on the screen, a young lady strolled in a took a seat in her bright red puffer jacket, whilst her two delightful offspring barged into the room and proceeded to smash the whole place up. After a couple of minutes I learn the toddlers names as the mother screams out 'HOLZ!!! CONNOR!!! Get 'ere NAH!'... Holz and Connor, I'm guessing Holz is short for Hollie (as I doubt she would name her child holiday, although you never know these days with Chavs). I don't think you can get more stereotypically dregg-ish names if you tried...
I spent the next 20 minutes observing this wonderful Bracknell-ite in her natural environment, her kids running amok, playing with her tongue piercing with her teeth, and chatting really loudly on her phone, brilliant stuff. Terms such as 'PACK IT IN!' and 'DON'T MAKE ME TELL YOU AGAIN!' were shouted through gritted teeth as she made a weak attempted to discipline her children subtly. And it wasn't just the mother that provided fantastic entertainment! Connor would be smashing his hands against the walls shouting all kinds of things at passers by, as Holz would be picking up any 'waiting room toy' she could lay her hands on, before launching it at a)the floor; b)the wall; c)her mum; and d)her little brother.
Before you ask, don't worry I was safely dodging noddy figurines as they flew passed my face, and I did cover my mouth to prevent inhalation of any chav-germs. All-in-all, very productive day of chav-observation.
Benji
full name on screen.
Friday, 11 January 2008
For some reason, when the creator of this restaurant was thinking about names for their establishment, they thought that this would be a good idea............................. unbelievable (yet comedic).
Incase you are wanting to go to this place , here's the address:
Gaylord Tandoori
26 London Road
Twyford
Reading
RG10 9ER
Go there, get a picture, go home again, laugh at the picture with mates, done.
There is something mysteriously marvellous about those items that you will never use, yet excite the soul to such a degree that the word 'SALE' whips your body into a chaotic frenzy, and before you can say 'bargain', you're fitting the stupid over sized, magnetic treadmill into your car.
What have I done.....!? I've given into the stereotypical mindset of thinking '2008, the year of health and fitness!' and bought a piece of exercise equipment. Now, I can barely stand up in my room as it shines in all its massive glory, begging for me to touch it, to have a 'jog' on it, and generally enjoy it's company. But alas! Two days of ownership and already and I sitting in front of my computer bumming around avoiding looking at it, whilst hanging dirty laundry on it's protruding arms...
I've even positioned it so that whilst I run, I can stare out of my window looking at the world around me, the free world I could be jogging in, if I wasn't such a lazy bum being a wimp to the cold and rain outside.
At least it's got an electronic 'calorie buster counter', so I make that 1-0 to the Benjmeister against the world of health :o)
